"i know life is unfair, but this is fucking ridiculous."

it's not even my birthday today.

and i'm sitting here thinking of all the stuff i want! ugh... it feels like i haven't gone shopping in forever. i want some nice new pieces in my closet... where's my suga mama? just kidding. where can i find a leprechaun who can lead me to a pot of gold?

i want a sheer-ish top i can pair with a pretty colorful bra.

i can't pull off beanies, but i want to try.

the above alexander wang items are too precious...

you know what i need to do!? two things: go on a strict diet/lose weight AND get a job that pays me BANK.

i'm drowning in you. i like it so much.

first time in my life i wake up and legit scream my head off because i have NOTHING to wear. i need money and a lot of it... stat. or someone (mom?) needs to take me on a shopping spree. i need cloooooothes. i long for clothes... i long to feel new clothes against my skin. smell the scent of new clothes fresh out of the shopping bag. the feeling of RIPPING off a tag and thinking that you've conquered something... THIS NEW SHIT IS MINE!!! type of thing.

a glimpse into our bbm's...

n/a

flesh and blood

perfection.

sometimes, i wish i were blonde. then i wouldn't look so drab and emo whenever i wore all black.

all the time, i wish i could wake up and feel that my skinniest pair of skinny jeans are too loose on me.

never... never do i doubt that two people can fit perfectly together, like a classic (and great) pair of jeans on a great-looking ass. perfect fit. thumbs up.

but perfection doesn't exist, and even so, i strive for perfection. i wish i could be perfect in the future.

a TA asked mich to tell the class what she wanted to do after she graduated. she said, "i wanna be famous."

correlation.

chaos in my mind.

do you mean everything you say?

no.

do you REALLY mean it?

-

no.

today is a no.

the past few days have been a no.

my life is booboo.

i'm in disbelief.

i'll go.

HELLO.

i have a big heart.

maybe i'm speaking too highly of myself, but i know that this is true. i love easily. i love a lot.

my heart is also weak. it's always been, and no matter how hard i try to put on a confident exterior, things get to me really easily. all my loved ones know this.

if you are disliked by me, it's just about the worst thing in the world. i say this because i have a big heart. if i dislike something or someone, the feelings are coming from an overbearing but also weak emotional base. i will mentally tear you up with everything that's burning inside of me.

you don't want to be disliked by me.


love me or hate me that is the question
if you love me then thank you!
if you hate me then fuck you!

ver2.0

things change.

i need whatever's in my life to stay constant.