i'm not thinking too hard, which is actually really good for me. i haven't felt that extreme self-consciousness i usually feel in the beginning of all my korea trips. oh god, now that i'm writing about it, it's slowly hitting me... nononoono stop stop. stop stop. stop. please. i'm trying my best to think of better and happier things. i'm on the 12th floor at the seoul u hospital looking out into this part of the city and it's fucking beautiful. it's filled with endless opportunities, things that can give life meaning, hit my soul, etc. the weather is getting hotter and more humid, everyone's hustling and bustling; in other words, it's pretty damn hectic. but i love it. and at the same time, inside the hospital a few rooms away, my grandpa is dying because of three different cancers and my whole family is just sitting and waiting. and waiting. and waiting. i hate waiting even more now. everything is so chaotic and depressing that it's almost beautiful.
so corny and shoot me if you want, but this is life.
live you. live us. live love.